The post slid through the letter box,
cascading onto the tile floor of the entry hall with
a sound like the wind rustling through bamboo. Lydia
Brooke heard the sound from the breakfast room, where
she sat with her hands wrapped round her teacup. With
her morning tea long gone cold, she lingered, unable
to choose between the small actions that would decide
the direction of her day.
Through the French doors at the far end
of the room, she could see chaffinches pecking at the
ground beneath the yellow blaze of forsythia, and in
her mind she tried to put the picture into words. It
was habit, almost as automatic as breathing, this search
for pattern, meter, cadence, but today it eluded her.
Closing her eyes, she tilted her face up towards the
weak March sun slanting through the windows set high
in the vaulted room.
She and Morgan had used his small inheritance
to add this combination kitchen/dining area to the Victorian
terraced house. It jutted into the back garden, all
glass and clean lines and pale wood, a monument to failed
hopes. The plans theyd had to modernize the rest
of the house had somehow never materialized. The plumbing
still leaked, the rose patterned wall-paper peeled delicately
from the walls in the entry hall, the cracks in the
plasterwork spread like aging veins, the radiator hissed
and rumbled like some subterranean beast. Lydia had
grown used to the defects, had come to find an almost
perverse sort of comfort in them. It meant she was coping,
getting on with things, and that was, after all, what
was expected of one, even when the day stretching ahead
seemed an eternity.
She pushed away her cold cup and rose,
tightening the belt of her dressing gown around her
slight body as she padded barefoot towards the front
of the house. The tile felt gritty beneath her feet
and she curled her toes as she knelt to gather the post.
One envelope outweighed the rest, and the serviceable
brown paper bore her solicitors return address.
She dropped the other letters in the basket on the hall
table and ran her thumb carefully under the envelopes
seal as she walked towards the back of the house.
Freed from its wrapping, the thick sheaf
of papers unfolded in her hands and the words leapt
out at her. IN THE MATTER OF THE MARRIAGE OF LYDIA LOVELACE
BROOKE ASHBY AND MORGAN GABRIEL ASHBY . . . She reached
the bottom of the stairs and stopped as her brain picked
out words from amongst the legalese. FINAL
DECREE . . . PETITION OF DIVORCE GRANTED
THIS DAY . . . The pages slipped from her numb fingers,
and it seemed to her that they drifted downwards, cradled
on the air like feathers.
She had known it would come, had even
thought herself prepared. Now she saw her hollow bravado
with a sudden sickening clarity--her shell of acceptance
had been fragile as the skin of algae on a pond.
After a long moment she began to climb
the stairs slowly, her calves and thighs aching with
the burden of each step. When she reached the first
floor, she held on to the wall like an unsteady drunk
as she made her way to the bathroom.
Shivering, shallow-breathed, she closed
and locked the door. The motions required a deliberate
concentration; her hands still felt oddly disconnected
from her body. The bath taps next, she adjusted the
temperature with the same care. Tepid--shed read
somewhere that the water should be tepid--and salts,
yes, of course, she added the bath salts, now the water
would be warm and saline, satin as blood.
Satisfied, she stood, and the deep blue
silk of the dressing gown puddled at her feet. She stepped
in and sank into the water, Aphrodite returning from
whence she came, razor in hand.
Victoria McClellan lifted her hands from
the keyboard, took a breath and shook herself. What
in hell had just happened to her? She was a biographer,
for Christs sake, not a novelist, and shed
never experienced anything like this, certainly never
written anything like this. She had felt the water slide
against her skin, had known the seductive terror of
the razor.
She shivered. It was all absolute rubbish,
of course. The whole passage would have to go. It was
full of supposition, conjecture, and the loss of objectivity
that was fatal to a good biography. Swiftly, she blocked
the text, then hesitated with her finger poised over
the delete key. And yet . . . maybe the more rational
light of morning would reveal something salvageable.
Rubbing her stinging eyes, she tried to focus on the
clock above her desk. Almost midnight. The central heating
in her drafty Cambridgeshire cottage had shut off almost
an hour ago and she suddenly realized she was achingly
cold. She flexed her stiff fingers and looked about
her, seeking reassurance in familiarity.
The small room overflowed with the flotsam
of Lydia Brookes life, and Vic, tidy by nature,
sometimes felt powerless before the onslaught of paper--letters,
journals, photographs, manuscript pages and her own
index cards--all of which defied organization. But biography
was an unavoidably messy job, and Brooke had seemed
a biographers dream, tailor-made to advance Vics
position in the English Faculty. A poet whose brilliance
was surpassed only by the havoc of a personal life strewn
with difficult relationships and frequent suicide attempts,
Brooke survived the episode in the bath for more than
twenty years. Then, having completed her finest work,
she died quietly from an overdose of heart medication.
The fact that Brooke had died just five
years before allowed Vic access to Lydias friends
and colleagues as well as her papers. And while Vic
had expected to be fascinated, she hadnt been
prepared for Lydia to come alive. Shed seen Lydias
house--left to Morgan Ashby, whod leased it to
a doctor and his family. Littered with Legos and hobby
horses, it had seemed to Vic to retain some indefinable
imprint of Lydias personality--yet even that odd
phenomenom provided no explanation for what had begun
to seem perilously close to possession.
Lydia Lovelace Brooke Ashby . . . Vic
repeated the names in her mind, then added her own with
an ironic smile. Victoria Potts Kincaid McClellan. Not
as lyrical as Lydias, but if you left off the
Potts it had a bit of elegance. She hadnt thought
much about her own divorce in the last few years--but
perhaps her recent marital difficulties had caused her
to identify so strongly with Lydias pain. Recent
marital difficulties, bloody hell, she thought with
a sudden flash of anger. Couldnt she be honest
even with herself? Shed been left, abandoned,
just as Lydia had been left by Morgan Ashby, but at
least Lydia had known where Morgan was--and Lydia hadnt
a child to consider, she added as she heard the creak
of Kits bedroom door.
"Mum?" he called softly from
the top of the stairs. Since Ians disappearance,
Kit had begun checking on her, as if afraid she might
vanish, too. And hed been having nightmares. Shed
heard him whimper in his sleep, but when she questioned
him about it hed merely shaken his head in stoic
pride.
"Be up in a tic. Go back to sleep,
love." The old house groaned, responding to his
footsteps, then seemed to settle itself to sleep again.
With a sigh Vic turned back to the computer and pulled
her hair from her face. If she didnt stop she
wouldnt be able to get up for her early tutorial,
but she couldnt seem to let go of that last image
of Lydia. Something was nagging at her, something that
didnt quite fit, and then with a feeling of quiet
surprise she realized what it was, and what she must
do about it.
Now. Tonight. Before she lost her nerve.
Pulling a London telephone book from the
shelf above her desk, she looked up the number and wrote
it down, deliberately, conscious of breathing in and
out through her nose, conscious of her heart beating.
She picked up the phone and dialed.
Gemma James put down the pen and wiggled
her fingers, then raised her hand to her mouth to cover
a yawn. Shed never thought to get her report finished,
and now the tension flowed from her muscles. It had
been a hard day, at the end of a difficult case, yet
she felt a surprising surge of contentment. She sat
curled at one end of Duncan Kincaids sofa while
he occupied the other. Hed shed his jacket, unbuttoned
his collar, pulled down the knot on his tie, and he
wrote with his legs stretched out, feet rather precariously
balanced on the coffee table between the empty containers
from the Chinese take-away.
Sid took up all the intervening sofa space,
stretched on his back, eyes half-slitted, an advert
for feline contentment. Gemma reached out to scratch
the cats exposed stomach, and at her movement
Kincaid looked up and smiled. "Finished, love?"
he asked, and when she nodded he added, "Youd
think Id learn not to nitpick. You always beat
me."
She grinned. "Its calculated.
Cant let you get the upper hand too often."
Yawning again, she glanced at her watch. "Oh, lord,
is that the time? I must go." She swung her feet
to the floor and slid them into her shoes.
Kincaid put his papers on the coffee table,
gently deposited Sid on the floor, and slid over next
to Gemma. "Dont be daft. Hazels not
expecting you, and youll not get any good mum
awards for waking Toby just to carry him home in the
middle of the night." With his right hand he began
kneading Gemmas back, just below the shoulderblades.
"Youve got knots again."
"Ouch. Mmmm. Thats not fair."
Gemma gave a half-hearted protest as she turned slightly
away from him, allowing him better access to the tender
spot.
"Of course it is." He scooted
a bit closer and moved his hand to the back of her neck.
"You can go first thing in the morning, give Toby
his breakfast. And in the meantime--" The telephone
rang and Kincaid froze, fingers resting lightly on Gemmas
shoulder. "Bloody hell."
Gemma groaned. "Oh, no. Not another
one, not tonight. Surely someone else can take it."
But she reached for her handbag and made sure her beeper
was switched on.
"Might as well know the worst, I
suppose." With a sigh Kincaid pushed himself up
from the sofa and went to the kitchen. Gemma heard him
say brusquely, "Kincaid," after he lifted
the cordless phone from its cradle, then with puzzled
intonation, "Yes? Hullo?"
Wrong number, thought Gemma, sinking back
into the cushions. But Kincaid came into the sitting
room, phone still held to his ear, his brow creased
in a frown.
"Yes," he said, then, "No,
thats quite all right. I was just surprised. It
has been a long time," he added, a touch of irony
in his voice. He walked to the balcony door and pulled
aside the curtain, looking into the night as he listened.
Gemma could see the tension in the line of his back.
"Yes, Im well, thanks. But I dont see
how I can possibly help you. If its a police matter,
you should call your local--" He listened once
more, the pause longer this time. Gemma sat forward,
a tingle of apprehension running through her body.
"All right," he said finally,
giving in to some entreaty. "Right. Hang on."
Coming back to the coffee table, he picked up his notepad
and scribbled something Gemma couldnt decipher
upside down. "Right. On Sunday, then. Goodbye."
He pressed the disconnect button and stood looking at
Gemma, phone in hand as if he didnt know what
to do with it.
Gemma could contain herself no longer.
"Who was it?"
Kincaid raised his eyebrow and gave her
a lop-sided smile. "My ex-wife."